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Being an adolescent
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| Former-Teacher | Date: Monday, 07.11.2011, 12:32 | Message # 1 |
 Dean
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| When you were an adolescent,
- were you loved by parents?
- did your parents try to guide every step of yours?
- were you often given gifts?
- were you allowed to do everything you wanted to?
- did you obey your parents on every little thing?
- were you recalcitrant?
- were you held responsible for wrongdoing at school?
- did your parents understand all your concerns and problems and help you by advice or a kind word?
- did you have enough support and motivation in the home?
- was the atmosphere in your family warm, friendly, encouraging?
- who influenced you more - your mother, your father, or both equally?
- did you feel lonely?
- did you come home late at night?
- did you feel your parents were harrassed by outside pressures?
- were your parents too strict to you. emposing harsh rules without much thought to your particular needs and wishes?
- were you ever punished or denied things?
- did you think of your future family or your own family's rules?
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| Zuzu | Date: Monday, 07.11.2011, 14:58 | Message # 2 |
 Monitor
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| I love my parents in spite of the fact that they punished me some time.They did it with the best intention. They didn't let me go out with my friends till late at night. It irritated me very much because I felt loneliness and misunderstanding. But only now I understand what good parents they are. They worry about my life and my future,that's why they protected me from the bad influence of my so-called friends. I cried as I was pinched. I envied my friends because their parents allowed them everything they wanted to do. They tried smoking,drinking alcohol,etc. Their life bored them very quickly for they had experienced all possible things. Their life lost an interest and curiosity. My parents brought me up well,formed my strong character. I am very grateful to them. And if I have a child, I will bring him or her up in the same way.
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| lovefootball) | Date: Monday, 07.11.2011, 20:53 | Message # 3 |
 Dean
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| Agree with you,actually almost the same thing with me! Ha-ha, I used to cry bitterly and why?! Ohhh, the reason was rather weighty - I had to come home at 9 and not a minute later!) True barbarity, isn't it?))) So stupid, really. Still no matter whether it was silly or not, all those moments (not only they of course))) gathered and made a new mosaic that is me today so I don't have any right to complain) Well...I must confess that though now I'm reasonable and realistic enough (hopefully)))) some issues sometimes become an object of our controversy)
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| Ole4ka | Date: Monday, 07.11.2011, 23:02 | Message # 4 |
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Student
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| Ha, I think our parents are the same. My parents were strict to me. They allowed me to do only little part of everything I wanted. This offended me because I was already grown-up(as I thought) and they treated me like a child. That's why we quarrelled with each other.
But in spite of some misunderstanding they always supported me, even if I was not right in the situation.
I have a sister, our parents always had enough time for both of us. So we never felt that our parents loved one of us more than the other.
No doubt that my parents brought us up well. I love them very much and I'm very grateful to them for everything.
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| lovefootball) | Date: Tuesday, 08.11.2011, 18:11 | Message # 5 |
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Dean
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| Well, I guess I should make a correction to avoid ambiguity - my parents aren't strict at all, sometimes my friends or acquaintances even get amazed when they see that I can take the liberty of saying/doing this or that thing with impunity) This doesn't mean I'm good-for-nothing and my Mum and Dad simply gave me up for lost)))) On the contrary, we're equal partners to a great extent and this democracy is skillfully combined with certain boundaries.
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| Asya | Date: Wednesday, 09.11.2011, 16:43 | Message # 6 |
 Union committee president
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| Quote (lovefootball)) democracy is skillfully combined with certain boundaries
When reading your comments I was trying to find the answer to the question whether my parents are strict or not. On the one hand, they are.But on the other hand, they are not. At all. So, having come across the very idea of yours I've realised that it is also so in my family. Restricted democracy. At the same time, I do believe that that there is no democracy without boundaries. In such a case it would be some kind of anarchy.
Coming back to the questions, I'll start answering them in the order of appearance though I foresee that I will not have enough patience and simply space to answer them all.
1.So, I'm convinced that all of us were loved by parents. As children. As adolescents. And then we will be loved as grown-ups. I can hardly imagine a parent that doesn't love his/her child. Such parents are either deprived of parental rights or they are some mentally disabled people that cannot realise what is happening in their life.
2.As an adolescent I was allowed to do nearly everything I wanted. My mother is quite a good psychologist. She knew that prohibitions only cause rebelliousness. That's why I was allowed to do whatever I wanted unless it was harmful or dangerous for me or other people. They didn't try to control every step of mine. On the contrary, when I claimed I was already grown-up, they said, "Fine. So, cook supper, take your sister home from school and from dancing classes, etc." That was funny. Well, that IS funny. When I was a teenager, I didn't find it funny at all. I used to think that I was a slave or somewhat like that. but now it's really humorous.
3. I think I was given gifts as often as I needed them. I can hardly remember being "overgifted" or "undergifted". 
I think I should stop here. Otherwise my comment will be too long. And nobody will read it. you know, long messages in the forum usually eliminate the desire to write something in the same thread. So, that's all for now)))
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| lovefootball) | Date: Wednesday, 04.01.2012, 18:09 | Message # 7 |
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Dean
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| Ha-ha, parents are so sly and wise)))))) I'm always about to laugh when I hear from a youngster, "Oh, I'm already a grown-up, parents should understand it and give me freedom!" That's nonsense, really. I realize it quite clearly that if you consciously call yourself adult, you have to earn your living yourself ONLY,cope with all duties YOURSELF and then, please - be free like the wind, create your own rules and live according to them, it's normal and no one will reaproach or blame you. But up to then,kindly behave properly and don't rush things)
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| Former-Teacher | Date: Wednesday, 25.01.2012, 13:38 | Message # 8 |
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Dean
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| I'm of the same opinion. But everything you're saying may run against the parents' opinions. Do they really understand what you understand? Do you want to be as free as a bird? I wonder whether in your future life you will replicate your own parents' model of upbringing. Or will you choose your own way?
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| Amaranta | Date: Tuesday, 10.04.2012, 19:30 | Message # 9 |
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| Well, my memories about a time when I was an adolescent are quite contradictory. On the one hand, plenty of things could admire me. I was very enthusiastic. Besides, I was interested in drawing. I went to a drawing school. There I made lots of friends. We had much fun together. I`ve been communicating with some of them till now. But on the other hand, I had a lot of problems. They weren`t my parents who create them for me. I created them myself. As I have already told, I was very enthusiastic. Great many things pained me. I was a very hesitating and naive teenager. Moreover, I changed my school. New teachers, unknown pupils, strict rules caused a number of difficulties. I had been slumping for a half a year. It was a nightmare. But I managed to overcome it and enjoyed myself in the new school.
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| Rosebud | Date: Thursday, 24.05.2012, 23:08 | Message # 10 |
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| When I was an adolescent there were a lot of pleasant and not very pleasant moments in my life. As for my character, I was a quite obedient child and I was always sorrounded by love and care especially by my granny who has been taking care of me till now. Though my father was often strict with me and I was often punished by him. But I love him and thank him for my upbringing. I like to recollect the time when I had the big noisy company and we walked till late at night; when I had a rest on the sea,when my relatives gathered together around a dinner table and celebrated some holiday. I would like to return this time, I like to dream of it.
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| Niakris | Date: Sunday, 23.09.2012, 20:40 | Message # 11 |
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| Oh, this damned transitional age! =) Really, it was an awfull, but very interesting time. I was a teenager with mega-difficult character, so there were a lot of depressions, gloomy thoughts and misgivings... It's terrible to recollect) But now I look at this time and at myself with smile. All these difficulties made me much more experienced, and now I'm enough ready to adult difficulties of life...
I can't say any bad word about my parents. They loved and stood me, even when it was difficult only to talk with me, because I always snarled. They gave me everything that they could give. They are the best people in my life. Thank you, Mom and Dad...
To tell the truth, the only thing that restrained me at that time is a thought, that I could upset or even d-i-s-a-p-p-o-i-n-t my parents. Their reproachful silence was the worst punishment.
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| :) | Date: Saturday, 29.09.2012, 09:23 | Message # 12 |
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Union organizer
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| When I was an adolescent I was not a good person.I always had scandals with my parents.We didn`t understand each other.But now I live alone and I miss my parents very much...I love them!!!
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| Perilova | Date: Thursday, 27.12.2012, 22:51 | Message # 13 |
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Head teacher
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| (:)) .But now I live alone and I miss my parents very much
Do you live in different cities? Do you often see them ?
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| :) | Date: Friday, 28.12.2012, 00:34 | Message # 14 |
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| (Perilova) (:))
.But now I live alone and I miss my parents very much
Do you live in different cities? Do you often see them ?
We live in different cities with my father.But me mother and brother live in Ryasan.I see them not often.Maybe one time a week.And with father I meet one time a mounth.I think it's bad(((
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| Pashkaa | Date: Friday, 04.01.2013, 13:32 | Message # 15 |
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| I'm eighteen, but I think I'm still an adolescent. 
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